In this Episode
- [02:32]Star Hansen shares her unconventional journey from acting to becoming a renowned organizing expert, emphasizing how she realized her purpose through a surprising career shift.
- [07:18]Discover the unique power of Star’s TEDx talk, how she manifested the opportunity, and why choosing the right TEDx event is crucial for your message to shine.
- [13:42]Stephan discusses the concept of clutter as a mirror of our inner selves, and Star expands on this transformative perspective.
- [15:52]Star offers a fresh take on creating a harmonious home by introducing ceremony and sacredness into everyday chores like unpacking and organizing.
- [20:18]Star explains her 10-step method for getting and staying organized.
- [25:43]Stephan and Star explore the importance of teaching kids to clean and organize effectively, promoting a mindset shift towards shared creativity and responsibility.
- [31:22]Hear how Star, even as a digital nomad, creates sacred zones in temporary spaces.
- [35:35]Star discusses the importance of workspace direction.
- [44:12]Star goes through the 10 steps to organizing your space.
- [53:08]If you’re called to work with Star, here’s how you can connect with her.
Star, it’s so great to have you on the show.
I’m so happy to be here with you chatting today.
First of all, I’d love to hear your origin story, how you got into organizing, clutter, and so forth. It’s not a typical profession for most people.
It’s not. And it was a complete and total accident. So I was acting at the time, living in LA, and I started booking work, but I just did not like it. It was not for me. I love Abraham-Hicks, and I love the concept that we have all these things that we manifest in life. And oftentimes, when you get them, it doesn’t necessarily mean you want to keep them. I was booking work, but I was just not enjoying the process. I kept saying, “I want my purpose in life,” as I think so many people do.
I was 24, and all I would hear was, “You’re a healer.” I thought, “No problem, I can roll with that.” While this was going on, a few friends were asking me to help them get organized. They saw that I was organized, and they wanted some help. After doing that for a few months, I thought, wow, I could actually turn this into a healing endeavor, which could be the purpose. I started doing it and did a little research.
Thank God someone had started it about 20 years before me, so I didn’t have to invent the wheel. It was great. It’s proof that when you’re doing the right thing, the universe meets you there and helps propel you forward. Because within a year, I was doing this full-time. Within two years, I was on television shows. It just has been this, in many ways, effortless flow. It’s not without time and work, but it’s really been a strong flow.
It’s amazing. Not everybody gets on TV, so that’s quite an accomplishment. How did that come about?
I honestly think it was because I had my picture everywhere. Having been an actor, I had all these great headshots. It was before social media and everything. This was back in the MySpace days when people took candids of themselves everywhere. I had these professional headshots on my website. I think that it elevated me instantly, and I’m really grateful for that. I remember the first big show I got was The Tyra Banks Show.
I was sure someone was pranking me. I was sitting on the couch with my boyfriend when I got this call. Someone said, “Oh, we’d love to have you on the show.” I said, “Oh yeah, why don’t you email me?” I got off and thought, “Who would be doing this?” My friends and I are always pranking each other. Then, I got an email from TyraTV, and I thought, “Well, okay, then.”
But the way that I experience the television is, again, kind of like one of those things that if it’s just meant for you, it happens. I never get a TV show from looking for one or going out and trying to get one. I get one from sitting at home watching a movie or answering the phone after a breakup. I’m not even necessarily in the best place. I always think that’s interesting. It’s not that I’m in such a high vibrational frequency, and then the call comes. It’s often the opposite. The call often comes when I’m in the middle of really living life, and it might be a little intense. I think it was just a thing I was supposed to do. And my training in acting and on-camera work really primed me for stepping into that world when it was time.
Amazing. And what about the TEDx Talk?
I did ask for it, but I didn’t expect it to come so fast. Well, I know I love speaking. It brings me so much joy. I knew that I wanted a TedX Talk. I was obsessed with TED Talks before they even became mainstream. I would just sit there and ingest them nonstop. I loved them. I thought, “You know, I really would like one. I don’t know if I’m ready, but I’m just going to throw my hat in the ring.”
My home city, Tucson, Arizona, was looking for speakers, and I thought, “Why not?” So I had my friend, who had this great green screen room, record me giving a 10-minute talk. I submitted the video to them. I thought, “No way, they’re going to take me. This is just me telling the universe that I’m ready.” But they didn’t just accept me; they made me their closer of the day. It was such a great experience.
What I tell people who want to do a TEDx Talk is, first and foremost, to know your mission. What are you here to do? Because it’s not about being a great speaker. You can be a horrible speaker and give a great TEDx Talk. It’s more about knowing your message, what you’re here to do, and then asking for it.
I tell people who want to give a TEDx Talk to first and foremost know their mission.
All I did was send my email and put my hat in the ring, and they said yes because it was the right time. It was really fun, and that organization was stellar. It really matters. Look for a TEDx organization that puts the time, love, and care in because I’ve seen people do TEDx talks with horrible lighting in cafeterias and maybe don’t even get a video. I got this highly produced, beautiful, plus coaching for months in advance. So, take a little time to research who you will work with because it is a next-level activity that leaves blood, sweat, and tears on the dance floor when you’re done.
What was the best or biggest takeaway that you got from those months of coaching in preparation for your TEDx Talk?
It didn’t even have anything to do with me. It had to do with coming together as a community. What was so beautiful, because I know I can deliver when the camera’s on and I step on that stage, is I don’t wonder about that. It’s just, “What lens do you want this in? Or do I have the right outfit?” That’s actually the harder thing for me to figure out often. But in this situation, we rehearsed together, we had our little groups, and we would meet up.
I’m still in touch with several people I did Tedx Talks with at Tedx Tucson. It was just this epic joy and pride. I get goosebumps just telling you this right now and remembering it, watching all of my fellow speakers go up on that day and watching them turn it on and seeing the light shine through and how people received it on stage and then to watch it later go out into the world. And it was so special to be a part of a group of people trying to make the world a better place in a really egoless, authentic way.
Traditional organizing methods focus on boxes and bins. But if you don't understand the deeper causation of your clutter, no system will work long-term. Share on XWhat else gives you goosebumps or has given you goosebumps, like some magic moments or insights or whatever that pop into your head here?
I don’t know if we have enough time to cover all of that. I feel like that’s just a part of being. One of the things that I do when I’m working is channeling. I’m also often allowing space for your highest essence to come out, the spirit or creator to come through, or whatever word you like to use. I know you like God. It’s just allowing a channel, a space for that. I have an online community called the Chaos to Calm community. It’s really just private coaching with me in a group setting.
We were doing a class last night and basically doing a show and tell for clutter whispering. They show me their space. I tell them my hits of what I’m getting. One of the people showed their spaces, and I was instantly flooded with who she really is, how she shows up in the world, how she brings herself, and her gifts to this table at this moment in time. When I have the honor of holding space with someone, and I’m able to see who they are, every time, every time I’ll get goosebumps, I’ll just feel lit up, and it reminds me that I’m absolutely on the path doing what I’m supposed to do. Because, for me, that confirms that you’re on the right track.
Yeah, that’s what I understand. The goosebumps are confirmation from above.
Yeah, absolutely. It’s a nice little tuning fork.
Yeah, it is. How did you come up with the term “Clutter Whisperer,” and what does it mean to you?
Oh, my friend, I’m so glad we’re talking about this. It is just so frustrating to try to market oneself as a solopreneur because you need to stand out from the crowd. You need to make it really clear in an instant how you’re different and who you are. I could have used Clutter Counselor, but Clutter Whisperer depicts what I do. It’s me showing up as this intuitive spiritual being. That’s a part of my process: showing up to listen to you, hear your spaces, hear your stuff, and help bridge where you are and where you’re going.
With organizing, every time I’ve hired a copywriter or a web designer, they’re ready to Marie Kondo me or put boxes in bins, and they’re like, “Oh, do you want to send us your favorite can opener?” I just want to make it clear instantly that that’s not the world I’m in. I’m not in the boxes and bins and organizing productivity systems world. I’m in the transformation world. I think that term illuminates that the best.
I’m not in the world of boxes, bins, and organizing productivity systems; I’m in the transformation world.
What do you think is wrong with the organization-consulting style of, “Alright, I got all these great bins, and this way of filing and tucking things away, folding things, and so forth will make it a joy?” What’s missing there?
In many ways, nothing. It’s perfect. We would never say to a pen, “Why are you not a pencil?” The pen is exactly what it needs to be. It’s doing its job. I’m so madly in love with all of my fellow organizers out doing their thing. I’m proud of the people who come up with inventions that make our lives easier. It’s just not the full solution for a very complicated challenge in our life. And so I think the industry as a whole is beautiful and, in many ways, is exactly what it needs to be. Other organizers and I are coming here to work on the much deeper process.
A couple of things that are missing that I see and that I try to meet through my work is there’s this conversation that clutter is bad. It’s bad. You’ve got to purge, get rid of it, hide it, and get it away from you. But I don’t see it that way. So I was listening to one of your old podcasts today, and we share this in common, which I love: we are all the same. I am the same as my mouse. I am the same as this air. I am the same as you. We’re all the same.
So, how can I be good, but my piles of stuff can be bad? If my piles of stuff are an expression of me, which is really universal life force energy, how could it be anything but good? Can I stop looking at it through the lens of fault and what’s wrong with it and shame and instead start to tap into curiosity and say, “What am I trying to tell myself here?” What am I trying to give myself or do for myself?” Because oftentimes, those piles of clutter are doing something to help us.
Organizing can be a sacred experience—releasing past versions of ourselves while creating space for growth and new beginnings. Share on XIt could be setting a boundary with someone you’re not ready to talk to. Maybe it’s you basically saying, “No, thank you” to the partnership because you leave clutter on one side of the bed that stops anyone from coming into your house. It could be a reminder that helps you stay tethered to being able to start working out or taking care of yourself fitness-wise. I’m always looking at what the clutter is doing to help you. How is it here to serve you?
Once you see that, you can get that need met in a more direct way, and then you can bypass the clutter completely. Or if it’s not such an easy solve, which many of these things are not, then that clutter becomes a reminder to come home to ourselves. It becomes a reminder of loving ourselves and continuing to choose ourselves in the highest and best way versus going down the shame spiral.
This almost sounds like shadow work. Instead of another person who’s triggering you, you see an aspect of yourself that you’ve disowned or don’t want to look at, and that’s a mirror for you. The clutter, in this case, is the mirror showing you an aspect of your shadow that you need to integrate or that you’re being invited to integrate.
Our society moves so fast, and so much is happening. We must slow down and integrate what is true for us.
Yeah, or a wonderful helper. If I leave those weights and all my fitness stuff in the living room, even though I trip on it every morning, it might help me work out if it’s doing something positive. And, yes, I love the concept of it being shadow work because there are elements where it is shadow work, and then there are other elements where we have the best intentions.
If I have tons of things from my friend who passed away, and they’re in my living room, but they cause me pain, I’m holding onto them because I want to go through them and reconnect with her. They’re both a demon and an angel. In our society, we are moving so fast, and so much is going on. We need to try to slow down and integrate with ourselves and say, “Okay, what’s really true for me?”
Instead of running and trying to avoid what’s happening underneath the surface by buying more stuff, eating, drinking, or having sex, we use so many meditators to escape ourselves and what it would look like to listen to ourselves really deeply.
One thing I learned from Kabbalah class was that all loss is an illusion. If we really take that on board and believe it to be true, even if that certain knickknack or memento is lost or destroyed, it really isn’t lost because this whole game is all illusion. We don’t feel this sense of lack, scarcity, or sadness about this object or what it stands for. It simply is, and if we’re not attached to it, then it’s a lot easier to shed the clutter. You may have some thoughts on that.
I think we don’t bring enough ceremony into the act of caretaking our homes. I was talking to someone last night about unpacking and how we get home, and we just toss our suitcase on the floor, and we get to it when we get to it, and there’s like a hostility that comes from us of, “I don’t want to be back from the holiday,” and, “Ugh, it’s not fun to unpack and to do laundry.” We think of all these negative things.
And I was saying, what would it look like if you created a beautiful unpacking zone in your home where you had a lovely luggage stand and it was painted the color you want or done in an interesting way with great light and maybe some music around or some essential oil, something that feels good. It doesn’t take much. Unpacking became not this annoying thing that has to be done when you get home, but it became this sacred ceremony of integrating what you learned and experienced on your trip into your daily life. It becomes a sacred experience.
I think that organizing can also be a sacred experience. It can look like we are releasing versions of ourselves or past chapters and creating and building. I actually think of organization as a creative process, not necessarily a purging process.
Organization is a creative process and not necessarily a purging process.
I think of it as something you’re building. When Michelangelo was sculpting the David, he said, “I just removed anything that wasn’t David.” So it’s this reintegration at all times, like every day, saying, “Does this still belong in my life? Is this still part of who I am and where I’m going?”
Someone who is very connected to their intuition is more likely able to get that sense of whether this object has outlived its usefulness or is no longer part of the current chapter of their life. But what about somebody who doesn’t have that kind of connection, and they’re like, “I don’t know. I can’t make all these decisions.” Barbara Hemphill famously said, a past guest on this podcast, that all clutter is delayed and postponed decisions, and I love that. I just wanted to get your thoughts on all that.
Oh, I love Barbara. I don’t know that anyone doesn’t have intuition. We may fight against it or not be as aware of it, but most people, if you say, “How does this make you feel,” are going to get an up or a down. They may not care enough about this to have a point of view, but generally speaking, almost everybody does. A lot of people who’ve struggled with clutter just don’t trust themselves. Organizing is a really beautiful way to come home to ourselves.
It’s when we’ve lived in a state that we don’t prefer, that we create, that we don’t know how we made it, and we don’t know how to undo it. It’s easy to beat ourselves up, think we’re at fault, and not trust ourselves. Organization is a learning process to trust ourselves again. I ask people to go really slowly, start small, and not just say, “I’m going to take on the whole left side of my house today or my garage.”
Organizing is a really beautiful way to come home to ourselves.
Find something you can do in 20 minutes or less and start to do less things to start hearing yourself again. Three questions I like to ask for any room I organize with someone are: What are the three to five activities you want to do in the space? How do you want the space to feel? And how do you want the space to look? Those three things are your guidepost for what stays and what goes.
If you don’t have access to that moment-to-moment intuition, that gives you a very practical, methodical answer: “Okay, great. Well, I didn’t say I was going to make this a reading room, so it doesn’t go in here.” It may not leave my house. It could go into a different room, but it doesn’t fit here. We want to really try not to start new projects in the middle of projects. It’s like, “I’m going to put this in the kitchen. Oh, but wait, that would mean a new project in the kitchen.”
Like, no, no, no. We’re just one thing at a time. The rest of your house can be the hottest of messes. And you’re just going to work systematically, one room at a time until it’s done so that you can breathe. Because if you splinter yourself, if everything is important, nothing is important. You can’t reclaim your home like that. You have to do it a little slower and a little bit more deliberately.
That’s great. How did you come up with those three questions?
Experience. I think by the time I really realized it, I was 10 years into my career, and I was working in the Bay Area, and I worked with a lot of people who were in tech, people whose intuition and feelings are not their first language at all. It’s not even their fourth language. I needed some really strong guideposts to work with people who needed that. For example, if I’m working with someone who’s not feelings-based, I’ll say, “What do you want to experience when you’re in this space rather than what do you want to feel?”
Clutter serves a purpose. Any system will work if you understand why you're holding onto it. If you ignore the deeper cause, no system will last. Share on XBecause they may not have access to that vocabulary, but most people know what they want to experience in a space. If your listeners go to organizingiseasy.com, I have a little handout that gives them my 10 steps for getting organized. It also will give them those three questions in a form they can print and write out. I always tell people to tape it on the wall when they’re organizing because it helps just to see it when you get overwhelmed.
It’s like closing time at a bar. You don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay there. So if you don’t fit into this room, you’ve got to get out of here. But because what we’re doing is curating spaces, we’re not just simply purging; we’re saying, “I’m building the space to be its next version.”
I like that. That’s a great perspective shift. Do you have an overall method or process that you’ve developed? Marie Kondo has this Spark Joy process and a huge best-selling book because of it. What’s your unique method?
I have the 10 Steps to (Finally) Get and Stay Organized. This came from years of working with people and realizing that most people are not taught how to get organized. It’s just not something we’re instructed on. When you were a kid, how many memories do you have of being yelled at to clean your room? Then, parallel that with how many memories you have of being taught how to clean your room.
Most people weren’t given this information. As time has passed, the world has become more complicated. We have more possessions than anyone in history has. And, of course, we don’t know how to manage them. We’ve never, as a species, had this many to manage. Our brains are probably not wired to manage this many. We’re not built to manage as many connections or stimuli as we deal with on a day-to-day basis.
I like to start there because it just puts you on the board. Feels like, “Okay, I can breathe. I feel like I know what I’m doing.” Because, again, most people trying to get organized haven’t been trying for a week or a month. They’ve been trying for decades, maybe their whole lives. I get a lot of people who, for example, had a late-in-life diet or late-in-life diagnosis of ADHD. And they just lived the first three or four decades of their life feeling like they were totally behind and screwing up. And that’s not the case.
I try to help you learn how your brain works for you. And again, I love the organizing industry, but most books are not written for your brain. They’re written for 70% of the general population. I get it because I’ve written my own book. I can’t write a chapter for every different style of person out there. I can write the book that I’m writing right now and then write more books to cover those other types of people. But it’s really tricky.
So know that if you look at a book, read something, or watch a video, it doesn’t resonate with you, it doesn’t mean that you’re broken. It just means that there’s another philosophy that will work for you. But in my mind, if you know those 10 steps that give you the structure, then if you choose Marie Kondo, it’s so much easier, or if you choose to use a different philosophy the way I say it.
I help you learn how your brain works for you.
It ties back into kind of the heart of my philosophy, which is understanding how you’re using your clutter to help you. And if you understand that any system is going to work, it won’t matter. But if you don’t understand the deeper causation of your clutter, no system is going to work long-term. You might get a little bit of a benefit, and then you’re going to backslide because it still is serving you in some deeper way.
Yeah, that’s so important. If you don’t recognize how the clutter is serving you, then you’re just sabotaging yourself to try and fix it.
And I’m not without knowing that what I ask is a lot. I’m asking you to dig up the thing you’ve been hiding your entire life and look at it after decades of attempting not to see it because it’s too painful. And sometimes, what’s on the other side of that understanding is divorce, a job change, and lots of things we may not like. It could be freedom and joy, financial abundance, lightness, and ease that comes after those first negative things that we experienced and didn’t want to experience.
Sometimes, I would love life to be this utopia, and I don’t think we’re on planet Earth for things to be effortlessly easy all the time. I think the way you look at it, like Buddhists, they’re not terrified of bad things. They’re not trying to out-manifest the bad things. They just look at the bad things and say, “That’s part of life, and I’m going to keep moving.” And again, we’re not doubling down on the bad things and saying, “I’d like to stay in this chaotic grief for the rest of my life,” but to understand that it’s part of being human, it’s part of living life. When we can accept it, take the edge off, and just say, “I’m going to lean into that sword and allow it to be here.” But also know that that’s not my true identity. To know that there are bright and beautiful days ahead and I can create those. I create them by really walking through what is.
A few minutes ago, you said that we weren’t taught how to clean our rooms as kids. That resonates with me. Do you recommend an approach for your clients that helps them teach their kids how to clean the room, avoid being messy and avoid creating a lot of clutter?
We’re not built to manage as many connections or stimuli as we deal with daily.
Yeah, great question. Well, the kids can definitely take the 10 steps with their parents. It’s nice. I’ve had that before. If you go to Star Hansen, the program is all online. It’s pretty quick for you to move through, and I’ve had whole families do it. My parents did a great job. I don’t have any memories of learning how to clean more than organize. But a lot of people don’t have that information. It was so cool to go and visit the family. There’s one family I’m thinking of who did it together with us.
I was at their house organizing something else. The son, who was maybe 10 at the time, instantly got out his toolbox, set his timer, and knew what he was doing. It’s like he was well-resourced for this process. And again, the minute you include them, and you don’t make it something that they have to do later, and you just integrate them, it becomes a part of knowing it’s a tool within them.
I understand that for parents of young kids, this is not easy. You want to include them as soon as possible and reward their efforts, not their completed project. If I could remove anything, it would be to only reward them for doing great. My stepdaughter was folding clothes one day, and they looked terrifying. They looked probably worse than they had started looking in the crumpled pile. And I didn’t care because that was her version.
The only way she’s going to get better is by repeating it over and over again. I don’t need it to look how I think it needs to look in my mind. I just need her to participate and understand that when clothes come out of the dryer, she folds them and puts them away. It’s bringing them into the process. And that can be hard when you’re running around and racing, and you know you can do it faster and better. So, really include them as soon as you can.
Let it be imperfect. The 10 Steps is such a great process. Here are one to ten examples of how we get through this very complicated, overwhelming process. Also, understand the difference between cleaning and organizing. Cleaning is cleaning, but organizing is different. Purging is different than organizing. We have to know that these are different things so that when we step into the arena of organizing a room, we don’t feel suffocated by all the things that need to be done within that.
We’ll definitely get to the 10 Steps with you in just a minute. But I’m curious to hear about what you were talking about earlier about sacred ceremonies and how there isn’t enough of them. How do you incorporate your kids into sacred ceremonies that help them establish rituals, perspective shifts, and transformations?
When they’re cleaning their room, it’s a great place. Ideally, the room is their sacred space. So it’s the first space. When kids live in this world, they’re following our rules, mad at them for not following rules they don’t even know exist. And ideally, their room is the safe space where they can really be themselves and let go. So, including kids and allowing them to be a part of making the decisions in their room. Sitting down with them at whatever age you feel like you can with your kids and asking them what they want from their experience in their room, and of course, you have your boundaries. Some parents don’t want their kids playing in their room, or they don’t want their kids on devices in the room.
Then, you come together and learn to collaborate and build together, talking about zones. I think it is really great with kids building zones. “What’s really important to you to do in your room?” You read. “Okay, great. Let’s set up a beautiful reading zone in your room. Do you want it to be in this corner with the light behind you? Do you want it to be under your bunk bed?” And really allowing it to feel creative. That shifts from being in trouble and needing to clean their room because they got in trouble to being able to welcome creativity.
“Do you want some extra lights in here? Do you need a higher table for that?” Because oftentimes, we also don’t think from the perspective of a child. We give them a thing, and we think they go. And then we wonder why they don’t do it. It’s because we haven’t thought of it from their perspective and how we can get down on their level, see things through their eyes, and really start to build the magic. With kids, it’s more about building magic.
It’s sacred to mindfully curate the spaces that you’re going to exist in.
How do you really start to see it from their perspective and enhance that experience? And to me, that is sacred. It’s sacred to mindfully curate the spaces that you’re going to exist in. Because then what happens is six months later, if that reading area is a hot mess, you say, “Okay, do you feel like you’ve transitioned out of the reading area? Do we need to change it?”
Then it becomes a strategy versus, “Why are you always leaving your books out? What’s wrong?” A next layer of creativity together that you can work on and enrich your relationship and their understanding of themselves.
That’s great. I’m curious if you have in your home a zone for—altar is not necessarily the right word—but like a sacred space where you can connect with your creator, guides, ancestors, and the unseen world. Is there a place in your home for that?
I do set up an altar of sorts in some locations. I like to meditate every day and enjoy having my cards. I love gemstones and the light coming in. It’s a really big part of my life right now, though a few months ago, I decided to put everything in storage and become a digital nomad. This room I’m occupying right now, and I still set up zones within that. To my left, there’s a chair, and by the chair, I have some mala beads. I have some books that I’m reading. I have a couple of journals and some gemstones. I’ll sit there and meditate, and I’ll process, and I do my activities there. Even though in a month, when I move on to my next location, I know that I require that zone.
I’ve never organized someone and found the right system on the first try. It’s just not possible because people are more complex than that.
I’ll actually build that zone in whatever space comes next. You have to be more creative. But you realize in transition that the zones are within you. I’m a person who meditates, and I require an altar space wherever I am. And so I have to intentionally set that up. And it’s the same with my work environment or my exercise environment. Even within one room, I can establish all of those. Whereas when I was in a home, I’d have a whole room for those activities, and now I have a room for lots of shared activities.
Do you apply feng shui principles to how you set up these zones, and what areas you decide are going to be used in which ways?
I am a big believer that we often know what’s right for us. I’ve had feng shui consultants come out, and I know my best directions. And so I try to honor working in my best or sleeping in my best direction. I try to avoid the major pitfalls. There is no mirror right across from me when I’m sleeping or door right in front of my feet that could pull me out. Or there are certain things that I will be mindful of. But when you’re moving from space to space, you don’t always get to control that.
It’s more about opening a feeling sense for me and saying, “Okay, great. In this space, what feels like an area I want to spend time in?” There are certain rooms that, if I was in a hotel and not home right now, I might feel very differently about sitting in a fabric chair in the corner. I might have a lot of thoughts about that and be like, “Okay, great, might want a towel down.” And so just what you want to do is you want to set the intention of, “How do I set this up in a way that lets me let go?”
Because I want to turn off that hypervigilance that we need to be activated to live our lives, and I want you to be really calm and grounded in your spaces. When you’re in a limited space, you can’t necessarily do a lot of feng shui, but I can follow my flow and say, “The light here is great.” And that feels really good. And again, it’s almost becoming like a child and looking around and saying, “What feels fun? What feels playful? What’s exciting to me?”
Like, I love working here because I have a window right over you, and I get to look at these huge, beautiful trees every day when I’m working and I need to sit and have a thought. And then, in my meditation space, that’s where the morning light comes in. I love the feeling of meditating and feeling light hit my body. It feels like I’m communing with nature and the creator. And if I did that for a couple of days and it didn’t feel good, I’d probably switch it around and move the chair, in bed, or on the floor.
One thing that we have to get good at is knowing that there’s not one answer—even feng shui. I’ve had feng shui people come out and do my house, and it felt horrible. Sometimes it doesn’t fix the challenge, right? But for us to be able to play, try something, see how it feels, and then shift it and play. I’ve never organized someone and found the right system on the first try. That’s just not what happens because you’re more complex than that. I’m going to set it up, and then you’re going to live with it, and then we’re going to tweak it and then live with it and tweak it and live and tweak because that’s the only way that we know. I might change your system between three to twelve times before we find something that really works for you. If you’re a super dynamic person, you might always want to change it because you like the shifting of energy in your spaces and your mind, and there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s actually a really beautiful quality to people.
Cool. Do you pay attention to which direction your desk faces when you’re working?
I do. So right now, I get what I get, and I don’t throw a fit because there’s none. There’s only so much space in the area that I’m in right now. But when I’m in a space of my own. There are several directions that I enjoy facing for myself. I always make sure that my desk is on wheels or has sliders on it because I want to face one direction when I’m talking to people, recording podcasts, or doing interviews.
And then, if I want to start writing or be creative, I want to face a different direction. If I need to manifest some money and I need that to happen quickly, I face a different direction. So if you ever come into my house, I’m just going to constantly be flipping that desk. In an ideal world, if I had enough space, I’d want two or three workstations in an office to use for recording and brainstorming and have this be my writing corner. That’s not where I’m living right now, but I can see that because I try to do that version of just being light. I do notice that it makes a difference when I’m writing; my writing direction feels really strong to me. And when I’m recording, my recordings turn out better if facing another direction. It’s just going with the flow and setting it up to support your experience.
I didn’t give this much thought until I was attending virtually a Mindvalley event, and Marie Diamond was one of the speakers. In the conversation that Vishen Lakhiani, the founder of Mindvalley, had afterward, or at some point, there was a Q&A or something, and he was explaining how Marie came in and feng shui his home and his home office. The thing that made the huge difference was changing the direction his desk was facing. He made a lot more money that year, and he equates it in part to facing a different direction. I just thought, “Well, that’s interesting, and he’s a credible guy, so maybe I should look into this more.” I’m curious to explore that more than I was maybe a year ago.
The other really important one is your bed. People don’t think about their bed often, but the direction you’re facing when you sleep is important. If you can’t hire a feng shui person for anyone who’s maybe listening, there’s a book called The Feng Shui Bible, and they go through a lot of different elements of feng shui. One of them talks about the different directions. But you want to align your directions for you, like your specific element of beingness. Knowing that is really helpful.
I couldn’t tell you mine off the top of my head, but I have them written down in my OneNote. So whenever I need to change things, I look, pull out my compass, and start to look around. It certainly doesn’t hurt anything. It’s like how you’re either a believer or not. And I have gemstones always around me. Someone could say it’s total garbage. I love them. They make me feel good, and they don’t hurt anybody. They just add to my joy.
Yeah, well, you don’t have to justify. I learned this from Bob Allen maybe 10 years ago. I took a workshop, or more like a mastermind, with him on becoming an author. He’s got millions of copies of his various books—The One Minute Millionaire, Cash In a Flash, Multiple Streams of Income, and all that. This idea that was so pivotal to me that he shared is that you’re not here.
Like, if you’re speaking on stage, you’re not here for the frowny faces. Don’t try to turn the frown into a smile. They’re not there for you; you’re not there for them. So instead of trying to obsess over turning that frown upside down, just talk to the smiley faces. They’re already on board, and that’s who you’re there for, and vice versa. So, if you’re thinking, “Gosh, should I apologize for being really into crystals and gemstones or whatever?” No, because the people with smiley faces in your audience already love it. You don’t have to justify.
I feel like I see some of my clients who feel the need to justify, or even myself, and I think it’s so easy when you’ve ever had a bully in your life who feels the need to diminish your experience because they want, “Well, prove it to me.” Prove to me how? There’s a study done. If you’ve ever had someone who requires that or really kind of pushes you, you’ll see people who feel like they have to defend themselves. And no is a complete sentence. You know, understanding that feels good. When I made my recent move—I left many gorgeous places—and people always say, “Why are you leaving? You’re leaving Carmel, you’re leaving Santa Fe, you’re leaving Tucson.” And the best was, one of my friends was like, “Why are you moving?” And I said, “Because it feels good.” And she was like, “Okay.” She didn’t need any other explanation. She didn’t need me to prove it, make it more interesting, or say what was next was more important. I don’t know if it’s more important. I just know I do what I feel called to do, which feels good. And so saying, “It’s something that I really like, and I don’t want to have a discussion about it. Let’s talk about something else,” because I think we often do that because we have had to prove ourselves before.
Yeah. Feeling good is the complete sentence, too, right?
Absolutely. Because it feels good.
Bashar is being channeled through Darryl Anka. Bashar shared this cool bit of wisdom: “Follow your highest excitement.” This is just another way of following what feels good—just do what feels good. And that’s enough. You’re being guided. Your internal spiritual GPS is sending you to a different city, job, or relationship because that’s how you’ll get your next great leap forward, lesson, or joy. So just follow it.
It’s so true. It’s funny. When I decided to write my book, I used air quotes. For three years, I was working on it, and finally, I just had this moment I felt through my being that I had to write it right now. I wrote it in a week. That book is exactly what I needed it to be. It does what I needed it to do. It’s living out there, and it feels so good. I tend to be a little bit impulsive like that. If it feels right to me, I don’t need any evidence.
I just charge forward—the same with my recent move. The move began with desert rats or mice going in. If you live in the desert, the mice will get into your car and start eating the wiring and stuff. The mice did so much damage that I had to have my car totaled. And I thought, “Well, I’m not going to buy a new car and put it right back as another buffet for the mice.” So I decided to have my car totaled and then just be a digital nomad because why not? That sounds like a great idea. So, I don’t know how many people would go from mouse damage on their car to becoming a digital nomad and not having a home anymore, but it made sense.
I think there’s something about following that flow. And there are times when I know I’m not of this earth. I can feel the spirit more than I can feel the earth’s plane many times. But I’ll just get into the flow of things. And I don’t even need logic anymore. Things always work out. I end up where I’m supposed to be at the right time, for myself or others. It’s not always about us getting what we need. It is sometimes about being of service at the right time, in the right space, and contributing your energy.
I’m a ley line healer. A lot of times, I’m just called to a location. I don’t get the memo about why I’m there, but I go and sit and meditate. And I know I’m doing something I’m meant to do there. Then the spirit tells me when I’m done, and I turn around and leave. I never think about the place again. There’s something beautiful about just following the flow and having it not make sense or justify it and say, “I’m just going to do it because it feels right.” And when it stops feeling right, I’ll change and do something different. And it may be for me, maybe for you, or some guy I’ll never meet. And it’s none of my business, really.
Yeah. Just like other people think of you, it is none of your business either.
My sole assignment is none of my business. I just am going to do it and keep on.
Yeah, right. I know we’re running close to time here. I want to make sure we get to the 10 steps. Could we go through each of those 10 steps?
Can I be honest? We can, but I feel like the 10 steps are not the most interesting thing. They are, to be clear, foundational. They’re really important. My friend always gives me a hard time. She says, “Star, these are so helpful and important.” And I’m like, “I know.” But now my brain is 10 steps ahead. So, the 10 steps are very easy, basic, and fun. And actually, your organizingiseasy.com will give you all of those 10 steps. It’s little subtle things.
So, set the intention. Asking yourself those three questions, gathering the tools and then you’re going to deconstruct, and then you’re going to go through in each category, and you’re going to look at each one, and then you’re going to take the things that don’t belong there elsewhere. You have to take things out and get them out of your visual space. Then you can clean the space you want to clean. Wherever you’re going to put things back, you’re going to create systems and then put them away. Then, you’re going to create maintenance systems. Then, you want to celebrate that you’ve done an amazing job. It’s funny how all these little things are not big, hard, or challenging.
In the 10 steps, I will go into the pitfalls. For example, the step of deconstructing a space is essentially like if I was organizing the closet behind me, I would go into that closet, and I would make sure that I had a clear space to work on. I would pull every single thing out of that closet or that shelf and I would spread it out and categorize it. Then I would go through each category, easiest to hardest, and decide what to keep and get rid of. Anything I’m getting rid of needs to leave the room. Then, anything I’m keeping gets organized and put back into the closet. And it’s funny how organizing is one of 10 steps.
And in all honesty, it’s not the hardest or the most interesting. And yet we bow ourselves around to it. I can’t tell you how many people I work with have so much clutter in the form of organizing books and bins because we collect them in the hopes that that one step will make it work for us. But it doesn’t. And the 10 steps are really, really important. They’re important to have a through line. But to me, what’s more important is how we use our clutter: the ways, the gentleness, the willingness to reframe it.
Having the tools is great, but having compassion for our journey and understanding what’s really going on under the surface in my mind is way more important than having the right boxes, bins or labels every day of the week.
So, one of your steps is to create your maintenance plan. How much work is that? Are we talking about like a big old document?
Create your systems for your laziest day. Create a system for the day you have the flu and just got home from a trip. I don’t want your systems to have a lot of upkeep or a lot of challenges. So you should be thinking about how I can add this maintenance to my existing process. For example, while brushing your teeth at night, wipe down your counter or put some things back with your left hand while brushing your teeth with your right hand. How can you build on laundry day? Can you make that choice to put away all the clean clothes that have been collecting on your treadmill in the bedroom while you’re putting away the freshly clean clothes? We always have that pile of clean-ish clothes in our bedroom that we tried on but didn’t wear or wore lightly, but we are going to reuse them. So you just want to build those on.
We must pay attention, time, and energy to a different space in our home regularly.
But this question that you’re asking is one of the reasons why I created the Chaos to Calm community. It’s so important that we really pay attention, time, and energy to a different space in our home regularly. So, our laundry room, for example, who cares if you have an organized laundry room? You go in there, you do your laundry, and you leave. But the truth is, if that laundry room is a mess and you’re tripping when you go in there, and you can’t find what you need because it’s a workhorse space, you need to organize it even though nobody else can see it, and it may not look pretty for the rest of the world when you entertain, it’s a space that supports you. So, in the Chaos to Calm community, we organize different rooms every month. You may not spend more than five minutes in that room, but at least you’re giving it a moment of your energy to say, “Is there something I can do to help support myself better through improving this space even slightly, even if it’s only 20 minutes?” So it’s because if you. Most people want to organize their whole house on a weekend, but who wants that? That would just be so exhausting at the end of that weekend, and it would probably not be possible. But if one weekend a month, you just say one weekend a month, I’m going to focus on a different room in my house and improving it in some way at the end of the year, you’ve touched your whole house, you start the next year again, you go to the next level, and you know that you’ll come back to it again, reinforcing that trust within ourselves, knowing you can count on you to help support you in the ways that you need to be supported.
That’s awesome. How big is that community?
Oh, it’s under 100 people. I like to keep it small. Having these wonderful people come together and share authentically is really cozy. And there’s been times when I think, “Oh, I want to make it so big.” But the truth is, if it was thousands upon thousands, most people wouldn’t feel safe sharing their spaces. They wouldn’t feel safe sharing the vulnerabilities that come up during decluttering and just living. I really love this intimate space because it feels so high touch. And that makes me really happy.
Maybe that belief is limiting your growth. There could be a way to have that intimacy and personal touch without limiting the scale. You could have certified coaches working with each of these different cohorts. And they’re small, intimate communities, but they’re part of a larger community that serves thousands upon thousands of people.
I love that. Maybe I’m going to hire you for some strategy. Being self-employed is so challenging because, a lot of times, we’re figuring these things out ourselves. And even if I hire a coach, most coaches have not done what I do. I’ve worked really hard to build a lot of things, but it is tricky. It’s tricky to know what I create. I’ve thought about doing a very low-end, easy-access offer where people can feel, “Okay, great, I’m there.” But I have such a huge heart, and I just want to give and give and give.
Finding the right people to support my growth is really important because it’s my precious heart and soul. Not wanting to create some machine that doesn’t maintain the heart is important. But I’m open. I’m totally open to new ways of evolving life.
Yeah, well, there’s this old adage that when people pay, they pay attention. So, if you give everything away for free, they don’t value it and don’t follow through. Whereas if you invested, then they’re more likely to want a return out of that investment, and then they’ll put in the work. So, by all means, give stuff away as you feel called to. But also know that there’s a lot of income and passive income, too.
That was really fun during the pandemic, taking teachings I had been doing and turning them into evergreen programs. That’s been nice. It also feels like high-level service because I do not need to have my hands on everything. It’s letting it go and live its life and have the people who need it find it and utilize it. I appreciate our technical world for its ability to let people do things in their own way on their own time.
Well, you’ve created quite a little empire for a solopreneur. If people go to your website not knowing how big your company is, they see all the as seen on logos of not just Tedx but NPR, Oprah Magazine, A&E, TLC, HGTV, and Woman’s Day. Like, wow. Larger than life.
Thank you. Yeah, I love what I do. It makes me really happy, and being of service is really important to me. I find it to be a sacred act. Organizing is like open-heart surgery in your home. It’s so vulnerable, and I think bringing a lot of heart and love to the process is vital.
It’s amazing. Thank you so much. If our listeners are called to do so, I would love for them to work with you. Where do we send them to sign up or at least start the process with you?
If you go to starhansen.com, you can get a free downloadable copy of my book. You can join the chaos.com community, which is one of my favorite places in the whole world. You can also take the Monster in Your Closet Quiz to find out what monster is hiding in your closet, keeping you stuck and disorganized. That’s a great place to start. There are even more classes. You can buy the 10 Steps classes on my website. I have tons of free opportunities and many other classes, so you can immerse yourself as deeply as you want. But I don’t want it to feel cluttered, so I give you a few options to start with.
Awesome. Thank you, Star and thank you, listener. Go out there and have a great week. We’ll catch up with you on the next episode. This is your host, Stephan Spencer, signing off.
